Shockin Samara

Well, I suppose it was inevitable. It just came a little earlier than expected. Last week, after a fantastic romp on Samaraskaya Luka, I was feeling slightly mad, as in wiggling out of a straight jacket. Really I was more pensive, trying to keep it from Jeremy and examine it by myself. Thinking it was just spending too much time alone, by the end of the week, it was clear. Culture shock surprise. It's funny though because even though I was altogether funky feeling, I got a lot of work done on my book.

Oh I didn't tell you I'm writing a book? Oh, you want to know what it's about? How does one answer that question? Let's just say it's a multi-cultural fantasy book I'm trying to write for children and hoping I can make it into a trilogy. You'd need to take me out for a drink to hear the detailed version.

Anyway, back to my unnerving feelings...I had spent most of the week inside. One reason being there was only one copy of our apartment key and Jeremy needed to meet with Yulia several times and even if I had one, I don't know if I would have ventured out. After thinking it through I think my perspective of Russia had a significant effect on my mood. I'll get into that in more detail next post. It has all left me now, so let me tell you how.

Besides really examining myself thoughtfully and emotionally, I finally talked to Jeremy. He agreed I was "just not Jen-jen." He remembered a time in Korea that rang of the same notes too. Just talking to him helped, but the next day we thought we'd navigate through the downtown area. I was so tense and irritable. I suggested we hit a coffee shop, so I got a nice caffeine shot and Jeremy mentioned during high degrees of culture shock, we yearn for comfort food, hence the coffee fix. Actually, it helped a lot more than I expected it to. Another reason for the shock was that I was just feeling helpless, the main cause for shock. That same day we got a key from Vasili (our go-to man) so I could have a bit more independence. I am not the sort of person that handles being so dependent on people. I love shopping by myself and even going to restaurants or a movie alone doesn't bug me. I think my brain just had had enough waiting for life to settle. I had to remind myself that learning a language and becoming well oriented to my environment would take time. I understand mostly that I just need to be patient about everything on a new level. As a follow up, this week has had some small victories, which I will also explain later, so as is well with my head!

One note of interest- Jeremy has so far eluded this shockin' monkey, but it's nice we weren't in the boat together, so someone could get us to shore!